Emily Stewart at Business Insider wrote about the gray divorce boom: nearly 40% of divorces now involve adults over 50, the rate has doubled for that group and tripled past 65, and the financial fallout is different from a divorce at 35. The assets being divided are retirement accounts and pensions, not just a house, and women's standard of living falls about 45% afterward compared with 21% for men.
I told her there are lots of little bugaboos and caveats that most people do not know to look for. The one I see most: it is very common in a gray divorce for someone to have left assets in the name of the ex, even if they have been divorced a long time and even if they paid a lot of money during the divorce. Beneficiary designations on a 401(k), an IRA or a life insurance policy do not change because a decree was signed. The account pays the person named on the form, and I have watched that form send money to an ex-spouse decades later.
The checklist after a late-life divorce is unglamorous: retitle accounts, redo every beneficiary designation, update the estate documents and powers of attorney, and confirm the QDRO for any retirement plan actually got processed by the plan administrator.
The decree ends the marriage. The paperwork ends the financial entanglement, and it does not happen on its own.